Let's have a smoke...

My friend Adam and I were going back and forth a little about the 8th Deadly Sin...Smoking.


It got me thinking about an encounter I had with a woman when Casey and I lived in Ogden. At the time, I didn't own a car. I was relegated to riding the bus to get from place to place...which is always fun. Nothing like those yummy Bus People* to brighten your day.
So, here I was, just standing at the bus stop and minding my own business...like the good boy I am. I was having a peaceful smoke and planning out my day.
Out of nowhere I heard dragging footsteps. I spied the source and recognized it was a bitter and mean hag of a woman I'd seen before. She was a bus regular...a.k.a. a bus person...and a quite rude one at that. After a few seconds she started fake coughing. You know the kind of sound I am talking about...that sooooooo annoying guff people make when they "quietly" try to say your smoke is bothering them...
When I turned to her, I saw she had pulled the top of her collar over her nose and mouth....I suppose I had forgotten I was smoking sticks of tear gas and not cigarettes.
I looked away, 20% aggravated by the "subtle" hints my smoke was bothering her, 80% gleeful it REALLY was. It took her a few minutes, but when I lit up another cigarette (I only did this for the extra "pissing off" value of it), she said, "Sir, you could not smoke that here?"
Her tone was not as nice as the question seems.
I ignored Cruella and took a huge drag. I let the exhale create a small layer of smog around me...she was not pleased.
"Sir!"
I faced her, with the cigarette hanging from my mouth.
"Can you move over there and smoke that?" Her gnarled hand was pointing to some obscure patch of grass.
I smiled and nodded my head. Indeed, that was possible.
I said, "Yes, I can," then took another drag as I looked at her. "I can, but I won't."
Hahaha...how ya like them apples? I topped it off with a quick little wink.
The expression on her face was priceless. If I had snapped her bra, I don't think she would have been more shocked.
I finished my cigarette just as bus arrived and, like the gentleman I am, let her board first.

I think more smokers need to stand up for themselves like this...be proud of our addiction. In Utah, and many other states, you can no longer smoke in restaurants, bars and smoke shops...what?! You can't smoke in a place dedicated to smokers?! Isn't that like saying it's illegal to eat your burger until you get outside of Burger King? What am I missing?
Everyone needs to relax a little. Calm down, it's not as though this is a new invention. Man has been smoking since the dawn of time.
I will pay my $3.00 in taxes, per pack, and smile as I do so...but can you cut us smokers some slack?
Why can't we all just get along?


*Bus People are the folks who pretty much live on the bus. They think that everyone on the bus is their nemesis or a buddy interested in how their day is going or where they are going. They also tend to smell VERY bad.